Joaquin Phoenix AND Miley Cyrus??? for those of you that don't know me, this is the type of shit I masturbate too.
That was a bit graphic, I hope everyone knows thats a joke.
My new goal in life is to lose weight so Joaquin Phoenix will mary me. There's a 15 year age gap between us, I think that's perfect for a celebrity couple.
BTW, If he starts dating Miley, their anti-suicide message will have failed.
I will have killed myself.
In other news, I'm super into Daisy Lowe lately. I think it's because someone posted a picture of her on the fashion spot with some Type 3 acne and that makes me feel better about being obese.
In other news Aziz Ansari is pretty funny. You can listen to his entire CD here.
Okay, I'm going to go work out and snort some coke so I will become thin.
I'm serious.
**edit: my roommate tells me the loneliest people are those who focus too much on fictional romances... god damn it.
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